What is the purpose and point?
Love God, love others, love self...
I feel like I have lost the point.

Was it stupid to make so much of me...that?
That even the thought of it going rips me apart and throws me to the ground?

It is so dangerous.
I don't want to sleep.
I'm afraid the nightmares will just get worse.
And I'll never wake from them again.
I am afraid this night will last forever and I will never see hope and...my beloved has gone...for good.

It is all my fault.
It has to be.
That is why the yelling happens...and the pain.
My sin.
My punishment for surviving.