I am feeling so...worn out with life...and just hearing the same words and phrases again and again.

After a while the words start to loose their meaning.

It could be about Jesus or sex.

I'm just sick of words loosing their meaning and me having to hear it...again and again. Something sacred should be treated as thus...and it's just so irritating to hear the same words...again and again.

Stupid!
Stupid!
Stupid!
Stupid!
Stupid!
Stupid!
STUPID!

I'm feeling lost in this...lost here and being within the boundaries of love and falling in and out because of You.
Chasing...running...falling again and again.
Just to find the answer...here and there...
...there and here.
Is it really coloring outside the lines
if it means getting lost in You?

I forgot that I was ahead about being behind when I quit.
Just needed to jot that down somewhere for future reference.

So tired...so much pain...so alone... =/

And now...a migraine.

Jesus...seriously?

Did I do something to make this the weekend from Hell?

Free to Run, Free to Feel, Free to See

You know...I'm not even sure what I would have done if things would have worked out 'perfectly'.

More than likely just panic, freak out and screw things up like I normally do.

Providence rarely makes sense from a finite perspective.

But there is the need to hope that...all of this will be okay...


I long to see fields of flowers
and feel the warm breeze on my face.
I remember when we were kids,
free to run through woods
and to play carefree.

Time was just a friend,
the seconds ticking away
until we could play
and imagine a new life
free of all pain.

Adventures anew
with every day
and I just long
to feel the freedom
that comes with faith
and belief in friends.

I just wish I could see you
and know it wasn't just dreams
conducting me on this path
but the words are so true
even when my faith is weak
and I need to be healed.

I just want to take you by the hand
and show you this childhood memory.
Tales of dragons and elves,
of good winning over evil
and the hope that this make believe
can one day be true.