I know I have my own bias towards Christian thought but something I just do not understand is why people outside of Christianity (or maybe some other religions) care about marriage. I know there is the fact it serves as a social construct but I just really can't break away from the notion that it is a bringing of a man and a woman together with God being the third and ultimate unifying factor.
Sex is in and of itself utterly bewildering and makes me feel uncomfortable but regardless it is a slight fundamental part of life. However, marriage is more then sex just as love itself is much more then sexuality. Marriage is supposed to be a unification of two distinct souls, bodies and minds into this covenant of one.
Spirituality and sexuality are hopeless intertwined because of them both being undeniable aspects of the human existence. Trying to say one is more important then the other is like trying to say water is more vital then food, in a sense there should be priority but at the same time if you focus only on one you will starve yourself from normalcy.
Being human is confusing, sexuality even more so, all the same there is still something very beautiful about the whole thing. Anyone who actually reads the Bible will notice that sexuality is flowing out of it like it was going out of style.
One of the most oddball things God does is express his love in relation to different forms of physical human relationships. He breaks things down in a simplified manner so we can at least try to fathom something otherwise incomprehensible. He says that he loves us like a father should love his children, Jesus mentioned wanting to gather together the lost like a mother hen would gather her chicks, Paul wrote that a wife should submit to her husband and the husband should love his wife with complete selflessness just as how Jesus loved and died for the church.
Spirituality and sexuality yet again. The physical act of sex is supposed to be (hard to know something you have never experienced, thank God) a physical, mental and spiritual bonding experince. At the same time, the Bible uses similar terms to express how we intimately know God. Yes, I am aware of how insane that sounds.
Through the Old Testament God would refer to the Israelites worshiping idols and turning from him as them committing not idolatry but adultery. Assuming I am following this correctly Yahweh was wanting to teach that it is not the little clay statues that matter, it's the fact that they were turning their back on a love relationship that was supposed to be as vital to them as air is to life.
I know I will be branded a heretic and a 'dirty liberal' for saying this but bottom line the reason I know Christianity is true is because of the indescribable intimacy of the spirit. I can assume that knowing Yahweh through his spirit is similar to the effects of knowing ones spouse in a somewhat sexual sense. There at least to me appears to be some kind of innate connection, something deeper then the pure physical.
Personally, I think that is what most people miss. Yahweh didn't create the universe, the heavens and us to simply sit around and wait for him to come wash our feet (although he has), he made us to live life and not to expect to have answers for everything.
Living in this Hell of a planet sucks. There is good but there is much bad too. When you have millions of people dying of malnutrition, people having to abuse drugs and alcohol just to cope with life, people running about confused and thinking they do not deserve to live life...do I need to go on?
There is a horrifying aspect to life that one can't deny but all the same there is something vastly beautiful. The intimacy we all desire and dream about will never be attainable through flawed and broken people. No human being will ever fix our broken hearts but there is something much more then us.
The way I look at it, I'm either insane or there is a loving God. How many insane people do you know constantly scrutinize their own personal sanity?
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Random Three AM Thought:
Sleep is good yet a distant function.
I however realized something, that being that one of the attraction factors that has been going through my mind, at least subconsciously, if that I am really attracted to domestic skills and qualities. I'm to tired to care about offending feminists so all political correctness aside; I just think it is quite amazing to see a woman that knows what she is doing around a kitchen, decorating a room, creating something out of nothing and the rest of that jazz.
It goes completely against my desires to 'run off and join the circus' but I think I really need that balance. Sure, it would be nice to be able to finally find a legitimate artistic means of expression that would entail travel but without having someone that was firmly grounded in reality it would be a disaster waiting to happen for me.
I however realized something, that being that one of the attraction factors that has been going through my mind, at least subconsciously, if that I am really attracted to domestic skills and qualities. I'm to tired to care about offending feminists so all political correctness aside; I just think it is quite amazing to see a woman that knows what she is doing around a kitchen, decorating a room, creating something out of nothing and the rest of that jazz.
It goes completely against my desires to 'run off and join the circus' but I think I really need that balance. Sure, it would be nice to be able to finally find a legitimate artistic means of expression that would entail travel but without having someone that was firmly grounded in reality it would be a disaster waiting to happen for me.
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Emotions = Headaches in Disguise
I will be honest, I really am starting to have a lot of disdain for emotions, feelings and all of that. Sure life would be a bit boring but it would be so less painful. That is quite selfish I admit, I would rather just eliminate the pain altogether with the good aspects of it.
I hate feeling captives to life, to who I am, what I am, where I am, where I am going, where I am not going. Life feels like a series of quite annoying circles that do not know how to adjust in the proper ways.
Attraction, love, emotion, feeling, sexuality, lust, love, adoration...all of them are just headaches. I wish I could just be purged of these addictive pains and just have it all washed away.
I start to wonder if what we view as all of these emotions and thoughts are nothing more then corrupt versions of what they should be, you have the whole idealistic view of love that i once had. But bottom line I would much prefer to be free from it all.
I do not like feeling that I am out of control, that I am bound by a bunch of madding chemicals, it also feels like I am one of the few people that want to question this, be upset by it or in general possibly develop a negative disposition towards it.
Did I mention being tired of the metaphorical prison and the desire to run free and find a deeper understanding?
I hate feeling captives to life, to who I am, what I am, where I am, where I am going, where I am not going. Life feels like a series of quite annoying circles that do not know how to adjust in the proper ways.
Attraction, love, emotion, feeling, sexuality, lust, love, adoration...all of them are just headaches. I wish I could just be purged of these addictive pains and just have it all washed away.
I start to wonder if what we view as all of these emotions and thoughts are nothing more then corrupt versions of what they should be, you have the whole idealistic view of love that i once had. But bottom line I would much prefer to be free from it all.
I do not like feeling that I am out of control, that I am bound by a bunch of madding chemicals, it also feels like I am one of the few people that want to question this, be upset by it or in general possibly develop a negative disposition towards it.
Did I mention being tired of the metaphorical prison and the desire to run free and find a deeper understanding?
Open Door
It feels like I am waiting for something to happen. I am sitting here in my chair and waiting for the flames to dance around me, flames that can purge and burn away this false sense of contentment that has threatened to drown me.
It feels like there are two worlds, a world where TV slogans and porn are the real basis for life, a feeding frenzy of lust in which the only person to loose is the one whose body isn't ravaged with disease. Reality so very strong that we cannot bear to walk through the house without viewing them on enough screens for every day of the week.
I cannot stand television.
The other world is behind a black veil. A world of polar opposites and oxymorons leading to a sense of surreal. A reality so strong that it is equal part bitterness as much as it is equal part joy. Black masks of death line the path way as they stand next to the purest forms of life.
Truth becomes a convoluted haze that is easiest to embrace when you do not know.
There is indeed a death of practical thought and action because it cannot be supported on the lifeline of nihilistic self help jargon that people enjoy consuming simply because they can better pat themselves on the back.
Truth is black and white as well as a full blown colorful rainbow of perspective.
An easy way to see truth is to realize you are looking for you first, after you determine to put your desire last you could possibly begin to understand a lofty idea such as infinite, holy and God.
It's to bad I am just as lazy as the rest of humanity.
It feels like there are two worlds, a world where TV slogans and porn are the real basis for life, a feeding frenzy of lust in which the only person to loose is the one whose body isn't ravaged with disease. Reality so very strong that we cannot bear to walk through the house without viewing them on enough screens for every day of the week.
I cannot stand television.
The other world is behind a black veil. A world of polar opposites and oxymorons leading to a sense of surreal. A reality so strong that it is equal part bitterness as much as it is equal part joy. Black masks of death line the path way as they stand next to the purest forms of life.
Truth becomes a convoluted haze that is easiest to embrace when you do not know.
There is indeed a death of practical thought and action because it cannot be supported on the lifeline of nihilistic self help jargon that people enjoy consuming simply because they can better pat themselves on the back.
Truth is black and white as well as a full blown colorful rainbow of perspective.
An easy way to see truth is to realize you are looking for you first, after you determine to put your desire last you could possibly begin to understand a lofty idea such as infinite, holy and God.
It's to bad I am just as lazy as the rest of humanity.
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Random Thought of the Day:
Like a fish out of water, we flout about in our petty little arrogance as we die drowning from exposure to an air we do not comprehend, much less unable to breath.
I honestly do not think human beings as a whole could be more confused and backwards in just their approach to life but with their individual executions of attempts to live life. Brought up from a young age to be self serving we wallow in petty addictions thinking someone else is to blame for our lackluster broken lives.
Sex, drugs and alcohol oh my.
I honestly do not think human beings as a whole could be more confused and backwards in just their approach to life but with their individual executions of attempts to live life. Brought up from a young age to be self serving we wallow in petty addictions thinking someone else is to blame for our lackluster broken lives.
Sex, drugs and alcohol oh my.
Saturday, December 8, 2007
Just a small thought
After the past few days of thought I think that this song sums things up in ways I lack the current coherent capable facilities to articulate any sort of sane or rational thought on.
____________________________________
Nobody else here baby
No one here to blame
No one to point the finger
It’s just you and me and the rain
Nobody made you do it
No one put words in your mouth
Nobody here taking orders
When love took a train heading south
It’s the blind leading the blond
It’s the stuff, it’s the stuff of country songs
If God will send his angels
And if God will send a sign
And if God will send his angels
Would everything be alright
God’s got his phone off the hook, babe
Would he even pick up if he could
It’s been a while since we saw that child
Hanging ‘round this neighborhood
See his mother dealing in a doorway
See Father Christmas with a begging bowl
Jesus’ sister’s eyes are a blister
The high street never looked so low
It’s the blind leading the blond
It’s the cops collecting for the cons
So where is the hope
And where is the faith
And the love
What’s that you say to me
Does love light up your Christmas tree
The next minute you’re blowing a fuse
And the Cartoon Network turns into the news
If God will send his angels
And if God will send a sign
Well, If God will send his angels
Where do we go
Where do we go
Jesus never let me down
You know, Jesus used to show me the score
Then they put Jesus in show business
Now it’s hard to get in the door
Angel
It’s the stuff, it’s the stuff of country songs
But I guess it’s something to go on
If God will send his angels
Sure could use them here right now
Well If God will send his angels
And I want my life
Where do we go
And I want to feel my soul
Where do we go
And I want to know love
Where do we go
And I want to feel
-U2, "If God Will Send His Angels"
____________________________________
Nobody else here baby
No one here to blame
No one to point the finger
It’s just you and me and the rain
Nobody made you do it
No one put words in your mouth
Nobody here taking orders
When love took a train heading south
It’s the blind leading the blond
It’s the stuff, it’s the stuff of country songs
If God will send his angels
And if God will send a sign
And if God will send his angels
Would everything be alright
God’s got his phone off the hook, babe
Would he even pick up if he could
It’s been a while since we saw that child
Hanging ‘round this neighborhood
See his mother dealing in a doorway
See Father Christmas with a begging bowl
Jesus’ sister’s eyes are a blister
The high street never looked so low
It’s the blind leading the blond
It’s the cops collecting for the cons
So where is the hope
And where is the faith
And the love
What’s that you say to me
Does love light up your Christmas tree
The next minute you’re blowing a fuse
And the Cartoon Network turns into the news
If God will send his angels
And if God will send a sign
Well, If God will send his angels
Where do we go
Where do we go
Jesus never let me down
You know, Jesus used to show me the score
Then they put Jesus in show business
Now it’s hard to get in the door
Angel
It’s the stuff, it’s the stuff of country songs
But I guess it’s something to go on
If God will send his angels
Sure could use them here right now
Well If God will send his angels
And I want my life
Where do we go
And I want to feel my soul
Where do we go
And I want to know love
Where do we go
And I want to feel
-U2, "If God Will Send His Angels"
Monday, December 3, 2007
This makes me seriously question the justice system in the US
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,312018,00.html
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-suicide22nov22,1,2129665.story?page=1&coll=la-headlines-nation&ctrack=1&cset=true
Bottom line that case illustrates one of the biggest problems in the US. People flaunt their right to free speech and then act all surprised when people expect them to be responsible for what they say or do. Freedom does not, nor will it ever mean someone can do whatever they please.
To sum up:
1.People need to learn the idea of responsibility for their actions. What kind of parent would make a fake Myspace profile and then proceed to deliberately torment a child with a history of depression?
2.The mother who made the fake profile has not even made any attempts at an apology. What kind of a mind job is this woman?
3.I know there are details I don't know and no one should know but bottom line this is one of the most sickening and disgusting things I have heard in a long time.
4.Doesn't this kind of sickness just SCREAM what the Bible says about humans being naturally bent towards destruction? My God, I just want to throw up from reading all of this.
My Solution:
1.Unrealistic - I think it would be rather appropriate if all the jerks that were in on this spent about twenty years or so in jail, or heck maybe a month or two...or maybe we should slap a small fine on them on the least as opposed to just letting people that helped contribute to an innocent girl's suicide get off free...
2.Realistic - Nothing will ever happen. I can't condone vigilante justice but it is nice to see I'm not the only human being whose sensibilities were disturbed by this garbage. I assume more political correct garbage will come running and screaming to this woman's defense and will also cause me to loose even more faith in humanity.
At what point are people going to start taking responsibility for what they do? The more this goes unchecked the more of a spoiled brat complex this country will have and eventually I think I may actually be welcoming whatever plague or act of God that wipes out humanity.
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-suicide22nov22,1,2129665.story?page=1&coll=la-headlines-nation&ctrack=1&cset=true
Bottom line that case illustrates one of the biggest problems in the US. People flaunt their right to free speech and then act all surprised when people expect them to be responsible for what they say or do. Freedom does not, nor will it ever mean someone can do whatever they please.
To sum up:
1.People need to learn the idea of responsibility for their actions. What kind of parent would make a fake Myspace profile and then proceed to deliberately torment a child with a history of depression?
2.The mother who made the fake profile has not even made any attempts at an apology. What kind of a mind job is this woman?
3.I know there are details I don't know and no one should know but bottom line this is one of the most sickening and disgusting things I have heard in a long time.
4.Doesn't this kind of sickness just SCREAM what the Bible says about humans being naturally bent towards destruction? My God, I just want to throw up from reading all of this.
My Solution:
1.Unrealistic - I think it would be rather appropriate if all the jerks that were in on this spent about twenty years or so in jail, or heck maybe a month or two...or maybe we should slap a small fine on them on the least as opposed to just letting people that helped contribute to an innocent girl's suicide get off free...
2.Realistic - Nothing will ever happen. I can't condone vigilante justice but it is nice to see I'm not the only human being whose sensibilities were disturbed by this garbage. I assume more political correct garbage will come running and screaming to this woman's defense and will also cause me to loose even more faith in humanity.
At what point are people going to start taking responsibility for what they do? The more this goes unchecked the more of a spoiled brat complex this country will have and eventually I think I may actually be welcoming whatever plague or act of God that wipes out humanity.
To do list::
-Find job by Sunday so I'm not kicked out of house
-Find a good job
-See about school
-Find a publisher
-Edit book
-Find sleep
-Sleep
-Think
-Wake up
-Misc fun stuff like eat food and read books
-Find a good job
-See about school
-Find a publisher
-Edit book
-Find sleep
-Sleep
-Think
-Wake up
-Misc fun stuff like eat food and read books
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Sunday Mornings, Huh?
First draft, done.
Been insulted and made to feel like a bum this morning, done.
Found a real job in order to have a flow of cash in order to have certain people shut the Hell up, five months and counting.
Been insulted and made to feel like a bum this morning, done.
Found a real job in order to have a flow of cash in order to have certain people shut the Hell up, five months and counting.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Meh at Being Human
Call me crazy but free will, being human, emotions, feeling, pain and etc are all completely and utterly over rated. As far as I am concerned the notion of contemporary dating practices was forged in the pits of Hell itself.
I am sick of drama, sick of people to immature to deal with themselves and most certianly tired of them affecting me.
So close and yet so far from 50,000 words...nanowrimo you will be mine!
I am sick of drama, sick of people to immature to deal with themselves and most certianly tired of them affecting me.
So close and yet so far from 50,000 words...nanowrimo you will be mine!
Friday, November 23, 2007
I Don't Like the Looks of Plan B
So far this life journey of mine has made no sense, furthermore I do not expect it to ever make sense and will save myself trouble in simply anticipating everything to become even more confusing and ever increasing in its nonsensical.
That said, the current boat I've been on for a few months is starting to take on a lot of water and things are not looking good.
I'm going to have to bail out or simply drown.
That said, the current boat I've been on for a few months is starting to take on a lot of water and things are not looking good.
I'm going to have to bail out or simply drown.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Happy Thanksgiving to all...
I'll be honest, I'm not huge on family oriented events. I have never understood how to act at one, what to do, where to be, what to say and how to say it. If I could genuinely be myself...smile, make corny/utterly mind blowing jokes, talk about random knowledge, understand the people I was around, felt like I was being understood...then that would all be peachy. But it's not, not really.
The question I ask myself is how much is my fault? Do I not want to be sociable? Am I just being a selfish little cry baby about problems that occurred years and maybe even almost decades ago?
Another question for the ages: Who am I, really? Am I simply defined by the perceptions of others? The individual failures and victories in life? The sum total of my entire being? Does any of this really even matter? Assuming it does matter, does it even matter that it matters (thank you for that little tidbit Marvin, you've always been my favorite fictional paranoid android)?
Don't misunderstand me, I am not simply trying to complain or say stuff simply because I can. These are legitimate thoughts that run through my mind at any given time through any of the time I dwell at this house located in the middle of nowhere.
As a kind friend of mine pointed it out, I need actual legitimate fellowship of some kind. Can you buy those in six packs at Wal-Mart? I find it rather odd how we seek to replace genuine human contact with this lovely digital universe in front of you. I'm not sure how much is intentional and how much is the bastard child of commercialism but it seems like genuine human contact is going down with the advent of the digitalized.
There really is no need to get excited, really. No need for deep and meditative thought. It's merely a day to rejoice and give thanks for things we do not realize are around us. It'll all be okay as the hours roll by and the lives we live continue to slip further and further away from our grasps.
Um, on a happy note...uh...um...I like...books?
The question I ask myself is how much is my fault? Do I not want to be sociable? Am I just being a selfish little cry baby about problems that occurred years and maybe even almost decades ago?
Another question for the ages: Who am I, really? Am I simply defined by the perceptions of others? The individual failures and victories in life? The sum total of my entire being? Does any of this really even matter? Assuming it does matter, does it even matter that it matters (thank you for that little tidbit Marvin, you've always been my favorite fictional paranoid android)?
Don't misunderstand me, I am not simply trying to complain or say stuff simply because I can. These are legitimate thoughts that run through my mind at any given time through any of the time I dwell at this house located in the middle of nowhere.
As a kind friend of mine pointed it out, I need actual legitimate fellowship of some kind. Can you buy those in six packs at Wal-Mart? I find it rather odd how we seek to replace genuine human contact with this lovely digital universe in front of you. I'm not sure how much is intentional and how much is the bastard child of commercialism but it seems like genuine human contact is going down with the advent of the digitalized.
There really is no need to get excited, really. No need for deep and meditative thought. It's merely a day to rejoice and give thanks for things we do not realize are around us. It'll all be okay as the hours roll by and the lives we live continue to slip further and further away from our grasps.
Um, on a happy note...uh...um...I like...books?
Monday, November 19, 2007
To Write List:
In an effort to keep track of the growing number of things I want to write about I'm going to keep a running tally of the works I would like to work on at some point, assuming I have enough time at some point.
Essays to be written:
-A rather large digression concerning the ideas of grace and as to why that is the polar opposite of the popular notion of religion.
-Expansion of the paper on Christian thought and Humanities
-Yet another self realized essay demonstrating the fact I am more aware of my own humanity then most other people would care to know.
-The spiritual associations of harder rock/metal.
Stories to be written:
-Current novel
-Novelization of Ghetto Zorro
-Interesting little story inspired by a particular mouse from the Chronicles of Narnia
-"Shadowy Shores", no clue what that is but you must admit it's an awesome title
-"Echoing Falls" Yet another neat title with no actual story.
Essays to be written:
-A rather large digression concerning the ideas of grace and as to why that is the polar opposite of the popular notion of religion.
-Expansion of the paper on Christian thought and Humanities
-Yet another self realized essay demonstrating the fact I am more aware of my own humanity then most other people would care to know.
-The spiritual associations of harder rock/metal.
Stories to be written:
-Current novel
-Novelization of Ghetto Zorro
-Interesting little story inspired by a particular mouse from the Chronicles of Narnia
-"Shadowy Shores", no clue what that is but you must admit it's an awesome title
-"Echoing Falls" Yet another neat title with no actual story.
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Can't Sleep
*See the above title*
I would like to go to sleep now.
I do not want to keep thinking about thigns that are seriously bothering me and causing me to be at best, very irate.
I am tired of having things to complain about. Especially when the whole of my entire problem is myself.
Woo for insomnia.
I would like to go to sleep now.
I do not want to keep thinking about thigns that are seriously bothering me and causing me to be at best, very irate.
I am tired of having things to complain about. Especially when the whole of my entire problem is myself.
Woo for insomnia.
Today
I absolutely am starting to hate the moments in life where it feels as if I am waking up from a dream. I become aware of the insignificance of my person in the vast context of a rather large rock spinning about rather haphazardly in a very improbable universe of virtually infinite possibilities.
As odd as it is that I believe so strongly in purpose, in responsibility, in those seemingly trite things. Believing in simple yet intoxicating beautiful things. Believing that the sun will still rise after the darkest nights, believing in that new sun shining on morning dew covering roses, believing in naive yet powerful dreams of the innocence of childhood, believing that despite the horrid paths we often take that there is a love so much bigger then we could dare hope to dream of.
There is the ever present belief firmly rooted in my mind...yet when you try to paint these beautiful thoughts against the cold and apathetic canvas that our world so often is...I can barely remember who I am.
The vast coldness threatens the heart, seeks to encase it with it's apathy and disillusionment. Even though I have always loathed the weakness of giving in I find myself at an impasse and i am simply to exhausted to go any further. I cannot even spare the luxury of looking at the view. I feel this deep seated need to sleep, to somehow let the soft darkness wash away these thoughts with sweet oblivion.
As odd as it is that I believe so strongly in purpose, in responsibility, in those seemingly trite things. Believing in simple yet intoxicating beautiful things. Believing that the sun will still rise after the darkest nights, believing in that new sun shining on morning dew covering roses, believing in naive yet powerful dreams of the innocence of childhood, believing that despite the horrid paths we often take that there is a love so much bigger then we could dare hope to dream of.
There is the ever present belief firmly rooted in my mind...yet when you try to paint these beautiful thoughts against the cold and apathetic canvas that our world so often is...I can barely remember who I am.
The vast coldness threatens the heart, seeks to encase it with it's apathy and disillusionment. Even though I have always loathed the weakness of giving in I find myself at an impasse and i am simply to exhausted to go any further. I cannot even spare the luxury of looking at the view. I feel this deep seated need to sleep, to somehow let the soft darkness wash away these thoughts with sweet oblivion.
Friday, November 16, 2007
No more triple posting
I swear, if I post another huge document on here and on my other blogs again, someone please shoot me. Or better yet, give me something so I can fall asleep. A nap is more deadly then a gun with bullets.
It Is Finished
After six months of being screwed over I have officially finished and submitted what had better be the last paper I ever have to give to the University of Mobile. If I fail ZERO HOUR community service class for the FIFTH TIME regardless of what part of the globe you inhabit you will hear my anguished profanity laced screams loud and clear.
No ifs, ands or buts, this is it. I am done with my bachelor of arts in Theology and in Humanities. Hooray. I walked across that blasted stage six months ago so technically I could qualify to walk again this May with the original class I was supposed to graduate with. Should I fork out the cash and walk again? I mean, who else can say they have graduated from college twice for the same blasted degrees?
Don't get me wrong, I have missed most of you wonderful Mobile people but you know there just comes a time in most relationships where you just...you know...can't exactly...well, I guess what I'm trying to say...is that I'm having to break up with all of you.
This long distance torrid love affair has been hard on all sides if you will be honest with yourselves. It's hard to write and think about someone you don't see everyday and really...I promise, your the best people I ever knew at college (please ignore the fact this has been my only university i have attended >_>)
I couldn't forget you people if I tried and to quote Bilbo Baggins "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve." Much love, many hugs and many happy returns.
*********************************
...you know, if it wasn't for the fact I already am living three hours north of Mobile that would actually seem sentimental or at least serve some kind of point. It's amazing of the useless things you do when you haven't slept in about twenty hours and have written for about seven hours non-stop.
Speaking of writing, I do think this has been the best paper I have ever had the privileged of writing. It took me all of these months and help from some special people but it is finished as best as it will ever be. I am always reluctant to share anything about my personal beliefs because I have this horrible habit of opening my mouth and shoving both feet into my mouth simultaneously.
Heck, anyone who is honest with themselves know they aren't perfect...but for whatever reason I feel compelled to live as best as I can...partly because I genuinely love people and do not want to hurt them and mostly because of the odd change in my life that love has wrought. Does the world need someone else throwing out their beliefs? Or do we need someone who is an 'honest' hypocrite?
I honestly have no clue. I look in the mirror and most days I see someone I haven't known for years...it's odd and surreal...but I think I am gradually coming to accept the fact that I am somehow this wonderfully odd assortment of broken parts slowly being turned into something truly beautiful. At least, that is my eternal hope and desire.
Well, without further adieu, I present my final paper for the good ol' U of M:
*******************************************************
Although there has been a tumulus history between Christianity and the field of Humanities, this has not always been the case. Christianity has never simply been an exercise of the spirit alone and neither was the study of the Humanities intended to be a mere exercise of one’s pure intellect. Both are intended to be holistic approaches to better understanding life as a whole, not just a single facet of the human experience.
The Humanities as a field has developed as being the study of the history of human thought. Included in this is the extremely broad spectrum of study in which the humanities encompass; included in this is everything from philosophy to literature, from art history to theology. This wide array of study is an attempt to better understand humanity as a whole and what is a person’s own relation to that whole. In other words this field of study makes an attempt to answer questions such as ‘Who am I?’, ‘Where am I?’, ‘Where am I going?’, ‘Who is God?’ and ‘Does He care?’
Christianity is intended to be an all encompassing worldview which helps believers to develop over time into what could be considered a fully Christ like person. Similarly the field of Humanities is concerned not just with deep thought but also on the historical, modern and contemporary interaction between people. Because a Christian worldview is intended to shape the entirety of a person’s life, the Humanities offer a vast pool of knowledge that can aide and complement in this endeavor.
The way in which a Christian worldview interacts with the fields of theology and the humanities is manifold. The fields of Humanity and Christian Studies themselves are two diverse and divergent fields of study that still have many overlapping areas. By choosing to study Humanities a Christian can expand his understanding of the different peoples and cultures around him. This becomes a vital resource because it is impossible to minister practically to those whom one does not have a basic understanding of.
Because of the field of Humanities covers such a broad array of subjects it proves nearly impossible to show its relation to a Christian worldview in such a short paper. However, Christians are not intended to be ignorant of the world of academia around them. Because of the timeless nature of God’s truth it is impossible for it to become irrelevant, despite the change of culture. However if Christians are not willing to learn and understand the culture that is growing around them then their approaches to ministry and relating the Word of God to the culture are doomed to become outdated and irrelevant. A few of the many important areas concerned with the humanities are philosophy, literature and history.
One of the most easily recognized branches of the humanities is the area of philosophy. Philosophy is defined as being “the rational investigation of the truths and principles of being, knowledge and conduct.” (The Oxford English Dictionary) Also, the Greek words which make up the word philosophy help to expound upon its meaning. ‘Philo’ meaning love and ‘sophy’ meaning knowledge; one can then infer that philosophy is meant to be both the love and pursuit of knowledge. Simply put philosophy is the attempt to understand and apply truth.
Philosophy as a field of study was originally developed by the ancient Greeks. Arguably the most famous Greek philosopher, Socrates, once remarked “…that the life which is unexamined is not worth living...” (Kolak, 61) This famous quote is in and of itself one of the most fundamental ideas of philosophy. The thought process continues along with the idea for a student to be successful they should constantly and continually question what they are taught as well as their own cherished personal beliefs. If one is not willing to attempt understanding of why they believe what they believe then they are merely living a half life, not truly reaching their potential as a person.
Comparing these thought with a Christian worldview, Paul mentioned numerous times that Christians should test the teachings they receive and whether or not they line up with Scriptural truth. This fundamental idea is quite vital because of both well meaning yet misinformed teachers, as well as teachers who are deliberately attempting to deceive people so that they can grow their following, can easily mislead someone who is not well versed in why they believe what they believe.
In the first chapter of the gospel of John, the author uses the word ‘logos’ multiple times in the text. Depending on the translation one makes logos can be interpreted as ‘knowledge’, ‘wisdom’, ‘word, or ‘reason’. In his writing John identifies Jesus as being the incarnate ‘word’ or incarnate ‘idea’. The way this would be interpreted in the minds of the Greeks that read his gospel was that Jesus was the wisdom, word and reason of God that became human and dwelt among us. Truth itself was seen as having a corporal body and expressing itself as love and in the miracles of Jesus.
Philosophy itself has had a long and intertwined history in which it has been used to both argue for and against the beliefs of Christianity. From the writings of Justin Martyr to C.S. Lewis there is a long history of philosophy and Christian thought walking hand in hand. In fact, during the Middle Ages many writers such as Thomas Aquinas and Anselm of Canterbury held that Christian theology and Greek philosophy were compatible and so much alike that they were almost exactly one and the same.
While visiting Athens in Acts 17, Paul observed that the Athenians were very religious in nature as well as their customs. Eventually when Paul spoke to them he spoke of their ‘alter to an unknown god’ as well as quoted from a Greek poet in speaking with those at the Areopagus. In preaching the gospel he was better able to relate the gospel message because of his understanding of their religion and by quoting writings they understood.
Possessing this knowledge that he acquired from his studies he was able to present the gospel in their context, using language they are familiar with and ultimately relating them in ways that otherwise would not be possible. This highlights one of the more practical aspects of the humanities, namely that it increases one’s ability to minister and serve by opening doors that would otherwise be shut.
Another example of the practical application of the humanities was the life of John Wesley. He was well versed in the areas of mythology and other forms of literatures. “The Wesleyan Quadrilateral: a quadrilateral was literally, a four sided figure. The Wesleyan quadrilateral was the four sources we rely on for what we should believe and do. They include Scripture, tradition, reason, and experience. Of these, Scripture is considered primary.” (Yrigoyen, 109) The methodology that Wesley developed was a practical utilization of the idea that one should bring as many diverse disciplines into harmony with one another. It is the marrying of the different ways of thought that can allow one to better understand who they are and their relation to God’s will for their lives.
One way in which thinking as a Christian affects ones understanding of the humanities is that they will put God’s Word ahead of any work of man. One of the constant battles Christianity has faced has been the one of the intellectual battle field. There has been a constant give and take battle as to God’s existence and for the worst it has directed people’s attention away from God and upon the intellects of those involved.
This battle has become more of a seemingly endless intellectual debate, losing any true spiritual value because of the loss of focus. Donald Miller phrases it this way:
My most recent faith struggle is not one of intellect. I don't really do that anymore. Sooner or later you just figure out there are some guys who don't believe in God and they can prove He doesn't exist, and some other guys who do believe in God and they can prove He does exist, and the argument stopped being about God a long time ago and now it's about who is smarter, and honestly I don't care ( Miller, 103)
When the intellect of the person is brought to the forefront it becomes an emphasis on pride and self bloated knowledge, not a focus on the wonders and glories of God. Christians cannot afford to be so caught up in their own pride that they neglect or at worse belittle non-believers because of feeling that they are somehow superior because of their beliefs and schooling.
Another way in which Christian thought shapes one’s interaction with the humanities is that Biblical knowledge is an integral aspect of understanding many literary texts. Older works ranging from Milton’s Paradise Lost and Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales up to more modern works such as Burgess’ A Clockwork Orange and Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451 all contain numerous Biblical allusions that help to define and deepen the works as a whole. Without a reader having the necessary background reading in Scripture, then these great literary works would lose both meaning and impact. So it is to the Christians benefit to be aware of the effects Christianity has had on the literary culture around them.
For the Christian all real truth can be considered to be God’s truth. This fact enables one to be able to freely embrace the humanities with no fear of discovery. As Paul said “I am allowed to do anything – but not everything is good for you. And even though “…“I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything,” (1 Cor 6:12) Just because we have the freedom to learn does not mean everything we study in philosophy or the Humanities will be beneficial. But, just because some aspects are not spiritually edifying does not mean that all of the field of philosophy should be discarded. We should use bold discretion in learning all that we have access to.
Just as theology is the attempt to understand God, philosophy is an attempt to understand knowledge, the logos of the universe. Combined together in study they become a powerful tool in which a person can better understand who they are as a person and how they relate to the God who made them in love. With the betterment of that knowledge once can truly have a changed life that is changing the world.
Works Cited:
Kolak, Daniel. The Mayfield Anthology of Western Philosophy, Mountain View: Mayfield Publishing Company, 1998
Miller, Donald. Blue Like Jazz. Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2003
New Living Translation. Carol Stream, Illinois: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. , 1988
"Philosophy." Def.5b. The Oxford English Dictionary. 2nd ed. 1989.
Yrigoyen, Charles. John Wesley: Holiness of Heart and life. Nashville: Abingdon Press, 1996.
*******************************************************
Comments? Suggestions? Hate Mail?
Feel free to visit nintene.blogspot.com
Godspeed my friends.
No ifs, ands or buts, this is it. I am done with my bachelor of arts in Theology and in Humanities. Hooray. I walked across that blasted stage six months ago so technically I could qualify to walk again this May with the original class I was supposed to graduate with. Should I fork out the cash and walk again? I mean, who else can say they have graduated from college twice for the same blasted degrees?
Don't get me wrong, I have missed most of you wonderful Mobile people but you know there just comes a time in most relationships where you just...you know...can't exactly...well, I guess what I'm trying to say...is that I'm having to break up with all of you.
This long distance torrid love affair has been hard on all sides if you will be honest with yourselves. It's hard to write and think about someone you don't see everyday and really...I promise, your the best people I ever knew at college (please ignore the fact this has been my only university i have attended >_>)
I couldn't forget you people if I tried and to quote Bilbo Baggins "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve." Much love, many hugs and many happy returns.
**************************
...you know, if it wasn't for the fact I already am living three hours north of Mobile that would actually seem sentimental or at least serve some kind of point. It's amazing of the useless things you do when you haven't slept in about twenty hours and have written for about seven hours non-stop.
Speaking of writing, I do think this has been the best paper I have ever had the privileged of writing. It took me all of these months and help from some special people but it is finished as best as it will ever be. I am always reluctant to share anything about my personal beliefs because I have this horrible habit of opening my mouth and shoving both feet into my mouth simultaneously.
Heck, anyone who is honest with themselves know they aren't perfect...but for whatever reason I feel compelled to live as best as I can...partly because I genuinely love people and do not want to hurt them and mostly because of the odd change in my life that love has wrought. Does the world need someone else throwing out their beliefs? Or do we need someone who is an 'honest' hypocrite?
I honestly have no clue. I look in the mirror and most days I see someone I haven't known for years...it's odd and surreal...but I think I am gradually coming to accept the fact that I am somehow this wonderfully odd assortment of broken parts slowly being turned into something truly beautiful. At least, that is my eternal hope and desire.
Well, without further adieu, I present my final paper for the good ol' U of M:
**************************
Although there has been a tumulus history between Christianity and the field of Humanities, this has not always been the case. Christianity has never simply been an exercise of the spirit alone and neither was the study of the Humanities intended to be a mere exercise of one’s pure intellect. Both are intended to be holistic approaches to better understanding life as a whole, not just a single facet of the human experience.
The Humanities as a field has developed as being the study of the history of human thought. Included in this is the extremely broad spectrum of study in which the humanities encompass; included in this is everything from philosophy to literature, from art history to theology. This wide array of study is an attempt to better understand humanity as a whole and what is a person’s own relation to that whole. In other words this field of study makes an attempt to answer questions such as ‘Who am I?’, ‘Where am I?’, ‘Where am I going?’, ‘Who is God?’ and ‘Does He care?’
Christianity is intended to be an all encompassing worldview which helps believers to develop over time into what could be considered a fully Christ like person. Similarly the field of Humanities is concerned not just with deep thought but also on the historical, modern and contemporary interaction between people. Because a Christian worldview is intended to shape the entirety of a person’s life, the Humanities offer a vast pool of knowledge that can aide and complement in this endeavor.
The way in which a Christian worldview interacts with the fields of theology and the humanities is manifold. The fields of Humanity and Christian Studies themselves are two diverse and divergent fields of study that still have many overlapping areas. By choosing to study Humanities a Christian can expand his understanding of the different peoples and cultures around him. This becomes a vital resource because it is impossible to minister practically to those whom one does not have a basic understanding of.
Because of the field of Humanities covers such a broad array of subjects it proves nearly impossible to show its relation to a Christian worldview in such a short paper. However, Christians are not intended to be ignorant of the world of academia around them. Because of the timeless nature of God’s truth it is impossible for it to become irrelevant, despite the change of culture. However if Christians are not willing to learn and understand the culture that is growing around them then their approaches to ministry and relating the Word of God to the culture are doomed to become outdated and irrelevant. A few of the many important areas concerned with the humanities are philosophy, literature and history.
One of the most easily recognized branches of the humanities is the area of philosophy. Philosophy is defined as being “the rational investigation of the truths and principles of being, knowledge and conduct.” (The Oxford English Dictionary) Also, the Greek words which make up the word philosophy help to expound upon its meaning. ‘Philo’ meaning love and ‘sophy’ meaning knowledge; one can then infer that philosophy is meant to be both the love and pursuit of knowledge. Simply put philosophy is the attempt to understand and apply truth.
Philosophy as a field of study was originally developed by the ancient Greeks. Arguably the most famous Greek philosopher, Socrates, once remarked “…that the life which is unexamined is not worth living...” (Kolak, 61) This famous quote is in and of itself one of the most fundamental ideas of philosophy. The thought process continues along with the idea for a student to be successful they should constantly and continually question what they are taught as well as their own cherished personal beliefs. If one is not willing to attempt understanding of why they believe what they believe then they are merely living a half life, not truly reaching their potential as a person.
Comparing these thought with a Christian worldview, Paul mentioned numerous times that Christians should test the teachings they receive and whether or not they line up with Scriptural truth. This fundamental idea is quite vital because of both well meaning yet misinformed teachers, as well as teachers who are deliberately attempting to deceive people so that they can grow their following, can easily mislead someone who is not well versed in why they believe what they believe.
In the first chapter of the gospel of John, the author uses the word ‘logos’ multiple times in the text. Depending on the translation one makes logos can be interpreted as ‘knowledge’, ‘wisdom’, ‘word, or ‘reason’. In his writing John identifies Jesus as being the incarnate ‘word’ or incarnate ‘idea’. The way this would be interpreted in the minds of the Greeks that read his gospel was that Jesus was the wisdom, word and reason of God that became human and dwelt among us. Truth itself was seen as having a corporal body and expressing itself as love and in the miracles of Jesus.
Philosophy itself has had a long and intertwined history in which it has been used to both argue for and against the beliefs of Christianity. From the writings of Justin Martyr to C.S. Lewis there is a long history of philosophy and Christian thought walking hand in hand. In fact, during the Middle Ages many writers such as Thomas Aquinas and Anselm of Canterbury held that Christian theology and Greek philosophy were compatible and so much alike that they were almost exactly one and the same.
While visiting Athens in Acts 17, Paul observed that the Athenians were very religious in nature as well as their customs. Eventually when Paul spoke to them he spoke of their ‘alter to an unknown god’ as well as quoted from a Greek poet in speaking with those at the Areopagus. In preaching the gospel he was better able to relate the gospel message because of his understanding of their religion and by quoting writings they understood.
Possessing this knowledge that he acquired from his studies he was able to present the gospel in their context, using language they are familiar with and ultimately relating them in ways that otherwise would not be possible. This highlights one of the more practical aspects of the humanities, namely that it increases one’s ability to minister and serve by opening doors that would otherwise be shut.
Another example of the practical application of the humanities was the life of John Wesley. He was well versed in the areas of mythology and other forms of literatures. “The Wesleyan Quadrilateral: a quadrilateral was literally, a four sided figure. The Wesleyan quadrilateral was the four sources we rely on for what we should believe and do. They include Scripture, tradition, reason, and experience. Of these, Scripture is considered primary.” (Yrigoyen, 109) The methodology that Wesley developed was a practical utilization of the idea that one should bring as many diverse disciplines into harmony with one another. It is the marrying of the different ways of thought that can allow one to better understand who they are and their relation to God’s will for their lives.
One way in which thinking as a Christian affects ones understanding of the humanities is that they will put God’s Word ahead of any work of man. One of the constant battles Christianity has faced has been the one of the intellectual battle field. There has been a constant give and take battle as to God’s existence and for the worst it has directed people’s attention away from God and upon the intellects of those involved.
This battle has become more of a seemingly endless intellectual debate, losing any true spiritual value because of the loss of focus. Donald Miller phrases it this way:
My most recent faith struggle is not one of intellect. I don't really do that anymore. Sooner or later you just figure out there are some guys who don't believe in God and they can prove He doesn't exist, and some other guys who do believe in God and they can prove He does exist, and the argument stopped being about God a long time ago and now it's about who is smarter, and honestly I don't care ( Miller, 103)
When the intellect of the person is brought to the forefront it becomes an emphasis on pride and self bloated knowledge, not a focus on the wonders and glories of God. Christians cannot afford to be so caught up in their own pride that they neglect or at worse belittle non-believers because of feeling that they are somehow superior because of their beliefs and schooling.
Another way in which Christian thought shapes one’s interaction with the humanities is that Biblical knowledge is an integral aspect of understanding many literary texts. Older works ranging from Milton’s Paradise Lost and Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales up to more modern works such as Burgess’ A Clockwork Orange and Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451 all contain numerous Biblical allusions that help to define and deepen the works as a whole. Without a reader having the necessary background reading in Scripture, then these great literary works would lose both meaning and impact. So it is to the Christians benefit to be aware of the effects Christianity has had on the literary culture around them.
For the Christian all real truth can be considered to be God’s truth. This fact enables one to be able to freely embrace the humanities with no fear of discovery. As Paul said “I am allowed to do anything – but not everything is good for you. And even though “…“I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything,” (1 Cor 6:12) Just because we have the freedom to learn does not mean everything we study in philosophy or the Humanities will be beneficial. But, just because some aspects are not spiritually edifying does not mean that all of the field of philosophy should be discarded. We should use bold discretion in learning all that we have access to.
Just as theology is the attempt to understand God, philosophy is an attempt to understand knowledge, the logos of the universe. Combined together in study they become a powerful tool in which a person can better understand who they are as a person and how they relate to the God who made them in love. With the betterment of that knowledge once can truly have a changed life that is changing the world.
Works Cited:
Kolak, Daniel. The Mayfield Anthology of Western Philosophy, Mountain View: Mayfield Publishing Company, 1998
Miller, Donald. Blue Like Jazz. Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2003
New Living Translation. Carol Stream, Illinois: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. , 1988
"Philosophy." Def.5b. The Oxford English Dictionary. 2nd ed. 1989.
Yrigoyen, Charles. John Wesley: Holiness of Heart and life. Nashville: Abingdon Press, 1996.
**************************
Comments? Suggestions? Hate Mail?
Feel free to visit nintene.blogspot.com
Godspeed my friends.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Going Slightly Mad
I am having trouble getting any writing done. I need more then inspiration as much I need something much deeper then I care to go into right now. Anyone feel like giving me some random plot lines? Some random dialouge? It's not that i am becoming lazy as much as I am just realizing no talent hacks such as myself have no buisness doing anything besides hiding in bed from the world. Speaking of which, I'm going to sleep. Now.
***************************************
Random stupid poem which wouldn't leave my mind for the past couple of days:
I Wish I Were a Tree
***************************************
Random stupid poem which wouldn't leave my mind for the past couple of days:
I Wish I Were a Tree
I wish I were a tree
For then I would never be
That which is known as me
I wish I were a tree
Simple perch to be
Whistling birds beside me
I wish I were a tree
Simply to be set free
Something besides me
Truly only God knows why I have had this stupid thing in my head the past two days…Be gone you annoying poem, be gone!
Monday, November 12, 2007
Progress
I am ridiculously behind in the word count but I finally broke the thirty pages mark. I've introduced almost ever major person in the book series. I introduced a deranged cult, a female Guardian that will be adding some fun oddness and I just managed to sneak in a few sentences about Nathan's sister.
I assume the cult is the one that is going to be trying to free the big baddie, the 'angel', if you will, is going to be the one relaying orders to Paul so that the group as a whole won't be totally screwed and Nathan's sister will have at least some minor plot points and some possible major ones depending or not on if I run out of ideas and have to kill almost every other major character with a rather large and very unexpected bomb.
Hey, it worked for Stephen King in "The Stand", right?
I assume the cult is the one that is going to be trying to free the big baddie, the 'angel', if you will, is going to be the one relaying orders to Paul so that the group as a whole won't be totally screwed and Nathan's sister will have at least some minor plot points and some possible major ones depending or not on if I run out of ideas and have to kill almost every other major character with a rather large and very unexpected bomb.
Hey, it worked for Stephen King in "The Stand", right?
Insomnia Fun!
After what was about an hour nap I have been up and not able to fall back asleep. Why oh why must insomnia be such a monster? Where is the weapon that I might use in slaying this foul nemesis?
Sunday, November 11, 2007
New Book Title
No clue what I am going to call this trainwreck of a book series that I am starting BUT I did think of a name for the next book I write that will not be related to this horrid literary experiment.
"A non Pilgrims Progressional Regression"
Bonus points to anyone that can name the books and authors I am making this a pun off of.
"A non Pilgrims Progressional Regression"
Bonus points to anyone that can name the books and authors I am making this a pun off of.
Mercy Killing
Is it to late to request that someone please shoot me and put me out of my literary misery?
I promise I won't tell on whoever does.
Things are at a GRINDINGLY SLOW PAINFUL progress. It is hard for me to work on my novel for a couple of reasons:
1.Life does not understand why this is more important then the rest of creation interacting with me
2.My back thinks now is a good time for it to act up.
3.Caffeine is becoming a very distant memory as I cannot remember where I stashed all of the Mountain Dew. Gatorade is good and all but it lacks that ZING that caffeine gives you. To quote Black Mage from 8-Bit Theater "Why it would take some kind of insane monomaniacal fiend to take pleasure in wielding the tapestry of creation to focus pure energy into reality through nothing more than my own will, the rush of electricity through my being, the power -my God, the power! IT'S THE ONLY TIME I FEEL ALIIIIIIIIIVE!"
*coughs* I can quite drinking anytime I want to...
http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=010505
I promise I won't tell on whoever does.
Things are at a GRINDINGLY SLOW PAINFUL progress. It is hard for me to work on my novel for a couple of reasons:
1.Life does not understand why this is more important then the rest of creation interacting with me
2.My back thinks now is a good time for it to act up.
3.Caffeine is becoming a very distant memory as I cannot remember where I stashed all of the Mountain Dew. Gatorade is good and all but it lacks that ZING that caffeine gives you. To quote Black Mage from 8-Bit Theater "Why it would take some kind of insane monomaniacal fiend to take pleasure in wielding the tapestry of creation to focus pure energy into reality through nothing more than my own will, the rush of electricity through my being, the power -my God, the power! IT'S THE ONLY TIME I FEEL ALIIIIIIIIIVE!"
*coughs* I can quite drinking anytime I want to...
http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=010505
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