Waltzing Out of Time

There is no release
and relief
from this famine of the mind.

There is no release
and relief
from this prison of your time.

Like some scorched earth
my mouth is dry,
cracked, crusted
and bleeding dry.
Feeling my crevices with
long sought after fluid
but never what I had in mind.

Just this coughing dry wheeze
of dust covered lungs,
chocking on self centered ego
and many lost mistakes.
It's never you
oh dear me
it's simply me.

I couldn't let you take the fall
and now,
now it is me you hate.
It is me you point the finger at,
whilest you strut like some
forgotten tart,
outside of time and her mind.
Not realizing her cracked beauty
and faded lips.
No longer with red
but a faded shade of gray.

Do you remmeber my first mistake?
Wanting your hand near mine.
The first on the list of many,
the last mistake my heart can take
and the last you will ever see of me.
I left your mind the second
I ceased to be your simple
little toy,
simply said
I was nothing to be and nothing to do.
Nothing to see and feel
but still
I can thank self deluded egomania
for this last dance.

The sad thing is you can't read this
because you never knew what you did.
The only crime committed was my heart
for attaching your soul to mine.
The only crime you did was breath
and live near this part of town.
The mistake was mine to live
and be
and breath
and exist in.
Every step forward is another mile back,
every single breath is another break,
every single being is this
and that
and those
and wishes unfulfilled.

If they didn't think me crazy
they sure do now.

This last dance
sure drove me out of my mind,
no matter the day or date
Monday or Tuesday
it was another one of those days,
you know the sort.
I wouldn't mind a little indulgence
or another burst of hope
ringing through my chest
wrenching my heart oh so tight.
Just another slow dance,
another serenade of the soul,
another movement in time
with breath in sync.
I can't lie to save my breath
except to me about you.
The only fool is in the mirror
for believing me about you,
not that you said anything about me
to you
or in exception to us.
Not much to see here really
just another self delude
dance out of time,
out of space
and most certainly,
as seemingly always,
out of mind.