Well...I think I manged to slam that door on my own face.
Do I at least get some sort of bonus points for trying to be a team player and sacrificing stupid thoughts that never should have been there in the first place?
All these circles.
Endless cycles.
Life is brief.
Painful and beautiful at times.
Sometimes I wonder if the answer it to become more stoic, more denial...or just give up and start wandering around.
I wonder how/if any good I am able to be with and to others...
The hour is late and too many thoughts...too many what if's...too may regrets about wasted time...and the need to go beyond mere feelings of sentiment...to casting everything in with Jesus and just letting go of everything.
If I put my health, my loneliness, my desire for a mate, my fears, my failings, all of my relationships...all of these broken and painful things...if I set them on this alter like you want me to...will you be here to step into the void I will have?
If I finally begin to trust, ask me to do all in Scripture...will that mean I might feel your peace...your strength, your grace and glory?
So often I am not sure I can see myself...but I know You are here...please, please, please do not leave my side.
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