Blossoming Thoughts, Running Red

Such terror,
abstract yet vivid
pulling and twisting,
contorting and brewing darkness
deep inside.

Everything you imagined it could be,
every lie,
every soul screaming tidbit,
every last dying drop of venom
that is holding me inside,
defining
imaging
reimagining
every last tidbit screaming across this soul.

Bleeding,
reprocessing,
reaping that which was sowed
just to hear you beg,
some sort of silence
and some sort of reprieve
from truth.

It's hard to see the face
of one who is a traitor,
willing to hear truth
just until it started to hurt
and started to bleed.
Everything with you is about the now,
nothing about what has passed
or what is foretold to come.
You see yourself
but don't see anything
except the lies you wear
to justify
such a pretty lie.
Such a disgusting way to live,
like life was yours to give
and all you do is take,
never seeing the choice you made.

As for me,
freedom.
From this slavery of indulgance,
ripping my soul to make you happy.
Living a charade just to please
your indulgent fantasies.

I'll claw my way out,
find the light
and dig until I can see
and feel again.
Know that this isn't death
and that to live is to breath.