I'm scared right now...I sort of just wish I could actually be held.

I hate feeling so alone, so separated...so unable to communicate with people and express myself about this.

I have to leave home, maybe for good...and for why? To save my life? To run from the pain, the confusion, the hate.

I want to actually be free.

I want to be able to breath again.

I'm indulging my selfish addictions of fear and lusting for freedom from myself.

The dark has never been so absolutely terrifying...I'm afraid to listen to music...it's like the walls are closing tighter on me and I want nothing but to be freed from this earthly shell.

...so why do I fear?