Rie Fu - Life Is Like A Boat

Nothing works to shut voices inside me up.

I'm tired of being so human that it hurts and I am full of physical, mental, spiritual and emotional pain.

I wish I wasn't so confused about who I am, who others are, so awkward about sexuality, so awkward about just being myself...and being around people and even knowing them.

I get so frustrated I want to scream.

I'm okay really...but it is so hard to just be ME. To exist as I am for my own sake, even with knowing a deeper love...I just long to be accepted and wanted for who I am.

I have performed my good deeds for the next few decades so I think today will be a day off from my normal moaning and groaning. I'm going to go lay down after having a rather painful MRI and I am going to play Fallout 2 on my laptop.

I am going to enjoy the intricate plot and corny pop culture references. I am going to scratch behind the ears of a crying neurotic cat and hopefully when my best friend comes over we are going to play Halo and blast aliens apart until our collective fingers bleed.

Goodbye stress and hello virtual ultraviolence.

I'm so tired but I already need to leave.

I have to dress and get another IV started to have another test that most likely won't reveal much.

Also, my cat keeps trying to talk. Freaky stuff really.

Here goes something about nothing.

Boy I wish I could sleep some more.

Violent eye twitch.

If things continue the way they seem to be, I will personally be the one making sure the nuclear apoalypse is triggered by next Thursday.

Blaaargh.

Die drama die.

Can't stand such.

Need sleep.

Need break.

Blargh.

Bleh.

Meh.