Showing posts with label depressed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label depressed. Show all posts

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Wishes in Pale Sunrise

I wish I could cry.
Let go.
Feel again.
Let the pain rush pass
and slip through my lips.

I wish I could cry.
Feel more.
Pain again.

But it doesn't matter.
The ones who would listen are gone.
It's a blank wall.

Scribbles on a page.
Passing by.
Day again.
Day again.
Another second.
One more labored breath.

Such meanignless phrases.
Time.
Love.
Loss.
Hope.
Doesn't make any sense.

Goodbye.
Goodbye.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

I feel so inadequate and stupid about not being able to actually find and get work.
Much less handle money.
It's a wonder I've made it this far by people being willing to drag or support me.
Self sufficiency isn't impossible but feels like some dream.
While I'm caught in this nightmare of false promises.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

You Know...

It's amazing how alone, really is alone.
Trying to hope...
So sick with bronchitis, strep throat, diverticulosis, anxiety, depression.

I wonder why.
Why.
Why.
I wonder.

Such vivid loneliness.
Palatable.
Tangible.
Painful.

Aching in my soul,
coursing through my blood
and ripping through my mind.

Caring was the first mistake.
Dreaming was just losing perspective
and pretending,
merely pretending
there was more than it seemed.