Nanowrimo 2012 - Day Five

http://lamecreation.blogspot.com/2012/11/nanowrimo-2012-day-5.html

"You Will Die in a Prison" - Showbread

"sometimes i feel broken
and there are things that i never say to anyone
like sometimes i don't feel rescued
and sometimes i don't believe you love me at all

when i allow myself the fantasy that i might have made you proud
i feel ashamed

i honestly believe with all of my soul that you love the whole world
just maybe not me

it's not that i feel overlooked or that you've done me wrong
maybe at the end of the day, i just don't love myself

when i try to impress you i hate myself
and i could run better if i could stay on track
and every time i turn around, every time you welcome me back
it's hard to love someone so big and be someone so small
and i'm afraid that you're the one who thinks that i don't love you at all
but i do

you rend the veil that hides your face
you speak light into the dark
you've beaten back the hoards of death
you tear their crowns apart
no more aching and crying
you lift the burden of my shame
no more breaking and dying
you remember my name

(i can see it coming:)
the ill and the affirmed leave their sickness behind
all disease is crushed in defeat
the shadows shrinking back, disappear in the light
the paralyzed rise to their feet

the broken and oppressed overflow with joy
the abused become royalty
darkness and despair are banished for good
and death can find no loyalty

the tormented see peace in the fading night
and all the brokenhearted feel their hearts begin to mend
the lowercase gods are all crushed by the King
the hungry and the destitute will never go without again

war and poverty are vanquished
no pain, no suffering, no dismay
evil, death and all their friends are forever washed away

our faith in you will cry out for the day
our hope in you will not be misplaced
for now we see through a fogged piece of glass
but soon we will see face to face

you rend the veil that hides your face
you speak light into the dark
you've beaten down the hoards of death
you've torn their crowns apart
come Lord, come! let the last be first
wipe every tear from the face of the earth
put all wrongs to right
make everything new
the cancer of death is defeated by You"

Broken Glass, Wandering Around

I catch myself looking in the mirror.
The tired eyes hiding behind long hair.

Who is there?
Stranger.

Eyes weary beyond their time,
soul leaking fluid
and the pitter patter
of broken relationships.

What is this?
Traitor.

Uncut stubble,
bleeding scrapes on forehead
prizes of a night life
untold quests of thirst.

The ache in my head
is only matched
by the hunger of my spirit.
The thirst in my throat
only matched
by the need of my spirit.

Twilight falling,
darkness is coming soon.
Hope abounding
despite the screaming
and the aching.

Well I feel like a horrible person for reasons that most likely no one who reads this blog will ever know or understand...except to say that I do not like who I am when I am on certain medications.

Or are they just revealing me?

The stuff I tried hiding?

It's like a sick joke.

I can't get the vomit taste out of my mouth.

Nanowrimo 2012 - Day 4

http://lamecreation.blogspot.com/2012/11/nanowrimo-2012-day-4.html

Yay.
A link.
That you should go read.
Go you.